Today marks 6 months of Cecilio and I being married! Wow, where did the time go? It felt like it's been forever, but with a blink of an eye it's been half a year. Because of today, and the fact that September is the most popular month to get married (June–October is peak wedding season where I live), I want to share with you guys my wedding dress process (from pinning to fitting to finding the perfect one), and I will share some tips for brides-to-be.
Just engaged–finding inspiration
When I just got engaged in March 2015, I started buying stacks of bridal magazines. Over 75% of the pages in these magazines consisted of wedding dress ads. So I would cut the pictures I wanted out and place them in my wedding binder (yes, I was that bride...but I promise I was not a bridezilla and I treated everyone kindly).
I started trying on dresses in 2016. By then, I saved the dresses I wanted on my David's Bridal app and set an appointment to try on dresses there. I also started pinning some dresses to show bridal consultants in case I ended up at a bridal boutique.
As you can see, I had a specific vision of my dress. I liked something more soft, romantic, and with a vintage flair. I loved lace, and it was really important for me to have sleeves or straps. I loved the look of long sleeves, especially because I was so self-conscious about my arms at the time (thankfully I lost 20 pounds between the engagement and the wedding). I just loved how elegant and modest sleeves looked in general. I refused to wear a strapless dress because of it and because I am really busty and was uncomfortable with showing cleavage. And in all honesty, I felt like the strapless wedding dresses were so overdone: too many brides go strapless, and it was a snoozefest for me. I wanted something more unique. I don't mean to offend brides who had (or have) strapless wedding dresses, but this was a personal preference of mine that I felt strongly about. I also did not want satin material, or those dresses with pickups (those ruffles that look like curtains).
I started trying on dresses in 2016. I actually only went to David's Bridal and one boutique. My first stop, at David's Bridal, was with my sister in January 2016 while my mom was in the Philippines.
When I first saw this dress on the David's Bridal app, I immediately added it to my favorites and had to try it. I immediately saw myself in it. I saved other similar dresses, but nothing compared to this particular one. When my sister went with me to try on dresses, I was so lucky to find that they had this in my size! When I first tried it on, I was a bit underwhelmed. So I went on to try more dresses. But I tried this on a second time, and since then, I couldn't stop thinking about it. My sister showed it to my mom, and she wasn't the biggest fan and encouraged me to try on other dresses (and I did, with secretly hoping that I'd still end up with this one).
Truly Zac Posen Wedding Dress
My consultant pulled this dress out for me since she thought I would like it. It was from David's Bridal's Zac Posen collection, and this particular dress was on clearance for $300. I thought that the zig-zag pattern was...interesting. It looked ok on me, I liked the lace. I wasn't a big fan of the neckline at all, especially with how thin the straps were. My consultant said that if I wanted it, I needed to get it on that day since it was on clearance and may not be available (it's now discontinued which is why there's no link). It was a no for me though.
I believe I saved this dress as one of my favorites too. I loved the beading on the neckline and on the sleeves. It was a coincidence that my consultant pulled this out for me. I liked how it looked, but I didn't love it. As soon as my sister showed me this photo (she took photos of me during these fittings), I hated it. It looked ethereal and princess-like on the model, but it definitely made me look frumpy and made my chest look larger. I wouldn't be caught dead walking down the aisle in this.
David's Bridal Mermaid Dress
This was the last dress that my consultant pulled out. I actually really liked this, and I didn't think that I could pull off a mermaid dress! The ruching on the torso made it look and feel slimming. I was actually torn between this and the first dress (the 3/4 sleeves). I still liked the first dress better.
Eventually, I set an appointment to try on wedding dresses at this boutique called Renfro's. It was a small boutique 40 minutes away and they were known for having GREAT service, gorgeous dresses that were under $1000, and the owner (Maggie) who was almost like the fairy godmother: she knew exactly what would dress was made for you. Maggie didn't help me, but one of her assistants did. Unfortunately, Renfro's is now closed because Maggie passed away a few months ago. But they have been around for 38 years! I went to try these dresses in March 2016. I tried at least 5, but my mom only took photos of these 2:
I've seen this type of dress before on brides and I really like it on them. I imagined what it would be like on me. This neckline is called "Queen Anne". I actually liked this when I tried this on, but when my mom took a photo of me, I was like,"nope". But I did like the angle from the back!
Okay, so I admit, I tried 2 strapless dresses here. Even though I told the consultant that I specifically did not want a strapless dress, she still brought them out for me. My mom was telling me to "keep an open mind, there's nothing wrong with strapless" and while it did look nice on me in person, this photo confirmed that I did not want to wear strapless. Which was weird because I would wear it for my high school dances and proms. But I really did not want it for my wedding. Also, this dresses was a bit big on me so it made me look wider than I really am.
So eventually, 2 months later we went back to David's Bridal. I wanted to show my mom my "dream dress" (the one with the sleeves) in person. Upon arriving and having to wait for our consultant, she was blown away by the dresses. She encouraged me to try different ones (and kinda hinted that my "dream dress" was too plain), and that since this was a wedding, we may as well go all out.
This dress ended up being the winner! I saved this in my favorites just in case my other "dream dress" didn't work out. I showed this photo to the consultant, and luckily she had it in my size. I told her that I did like it and wanted to check it out. As soon as she zipped it up for me and I got out of the fitting room, everyone was in awe. I was getting praises and compliments left and right. And in all honesty, I was a little overwhelmed by the big chunks of lace and how poofy it was (I hated all of the other ballgowns I've tried). The consultant gave me a veil to get a feel for it, and I was walking around the store smiling. I could somewhat see myself in it. I didn't cry. But when my mom showed me photos she took of me in this dress, I was sold. I was tired of seeing myself in dresses that were not flattering, and this was the only one that made me feel like a million dollars. This had everything I was looking for: vintage-inspired (this was a part of the DB Oleg Cassini collection, who dressed Jackie-O back in the day), non-strapless, and lace. I ended up loving the big chunks of lace! I loved how it sparkled from every angle. Yet at the same time, I surprised myself because I did not want a ballgown because I don't like anything too "princessy", and I hated all of the other ballgowns I tried. This one was different though. The icing on the wedding cake was when my stepdad surprised my mom (when she was in the restroom) by paying for my veil and slip!
I also saved this dress because I loved the sleeves and the beading on top. There are pickups here, but more subtle and not as "marshmallow"-like as the ones you see in satin dresses. This was also a really popular dress and it had good reviews among brides. I liked it when I tried it on (my mom lost the photo of me wearing it so I can't show it to you), but the neckline felt a bit matronly. While this is gorgeous and I can see why brides love it, it wasn't for me.
Getting it fitted
Once you found your dress, you're not done yet! As it gets closer to the wedding, you have to get it custom fitted to your body. You have to bring the shoes and undergarments you plan to wear. My seamstress had to take my dress in (especially because of my weight loss), shorten the length, make the neckline more straight-across, and add a bustle (which is supposed to pin the train of your dress back so that you don't keep stepping on it, most brides get their bustled for the reception).
My fitting in February
Now that I've gone through the wedding planning and shopping experience (and honestly, seeing these pictures make me miss planning it, no matter how stressful it got at times), I want to share nuggets of wisdom for those brides when it comes to saying YES to the dress!
- Gather photos from magazines of dresses you like, use Pinterest, etc. From there, you can build upon what fabrics, silhouettes and styles you are drawn to.
- Keep an open mind, but still stand firm on what you want and what you don't want. I know there were brides that said,"I know I didn't want strapless, pickups, satin, etc. but that's what I ended up falling in love with and getting!" Nope, I still didn't want a strapless dress no matter what. In contrast, I'm glad I kept an open mind because I ended up with a ballgown, which I never really imagined myself in (I was drawn more to A-lines, sheaths and trumpets). Yet at the same time I stuck to my guns about the elements I had to have: lace and straps or sleeves.
- Don't bring a lot of people with you. Yeah it sounds fun to have the whole bridal party help you choose, but that would've been really overwhelming for me. Especially because we all had different tastes, and I'm someone who tries to please everyone, so trying different things (based on my friends' preferences even if I know I would hate it) would've confused me and made me unsure of MY own decisions. I just had my mom and younger sister with me when I tried on my dress. Bring 2–3 people max.
- Have a budget. Don't even try a dress that's over your budget because if you fall in love with it, you end up longing for it. The reason I chose going to David's Bridal over a high end boutique was because I had a very particular vision of my dress, and I knew that if I went to a boutique to find that type of dress it would be way over my budget, and less likely to be in my size.
- Don't worry if you didn't cry when you found your dress. I didn't. I was just in lalaland and celebrated afterwards with my family over lunch and cocktails at Cheesecake Factory. I will be honest and let you know that I spent the next 10 months wondering if I made the right decision with this dress. I was torn between this and the other "dream dress" (the 3/4 sleeve one). But as the day got closer and I got my fittings done, I was feeling more confident about my dress. And on the wedding day, when I had my makeup and hair done, jewelry, veil, and shoes, I felt absolutely beautiful. It's a totally different feeling compared to when you first find your dress (under shitty lighting, wrong undergarments, not yet altered to fit you, no accessories, etc.) You should've seen Cecilio's reaction when we had our first look!
- Have fun! This is a once-a-lifetime experience, and enjoy every single second of it!
And of course, I can't let this post go live without a few more snapshots from our special day :)
Photos by Elisabeth Arin Photography
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